Hope in Bloom
Spring is the most beautiful season in Charlotte. So much is in bloom and there are so many shades of green – trees, shrubs, grass. My cousin Claudia once compared them to all the green crayons in the 64 box of Crayolas; her favorite “New Green.” Despite the pollen and what it means to allergy sufferers like me, I cannot help but feel renewed hope and that is especially important to me each spring.
My parents (pictured below in 2000) passed away this time of year; Mom on April 2, 2007 and Dad on March 28, 2011. I cannot believe we have been without them this long. As my sister wrote to me in a text that week, time is such a strange thing; minutes feel like hours and years seem like minutes.
Each year as March rolls around I find myself in the doldrums as so many memories of that time seem to re-emerge and I feel a sense of overwhelming loss all over again. I’ve learned not to be surprised by the emotions and to ride them out, always buoyed by the beauty I see around me.
Mom passed away the Monday before Easter that year and I don’t think that was a coincidence. That Easter Sunday service, and all that have since followed, remind me that she and my Dad are in a much better place of joy and beauty. That belief, coupled by nature’s incredible display of color and new life, helps me heal each year.
This year two more losses were felt. One a friend with whom I worked for many years; the other the mother of one of my dearest friends, a woman who became a surrogate mother to me after mine passed away. That made the “season of grieving” a bit harder this year, but their passing did not diminish the sense of hope I feel. Hope that there is always new life to replace the one lost.
Life is an interesting journey. You can suffer a terrible hurt while at the same time someone else is experiencing pure joy. In the end, all we can do is make the most of every day and not lose hope. I recently heard a young man who had been through some very tough times talk about how he was able to cope. He told us he always reminded himself, “there is something after this.”
For me, hope is eternal and I feel it best when the world around me is in bloom.